They say 30… is the new 45.
I have always believed in the idea today’s younger generation has gone soft. And now it is an actual fact. They done a study – and they found out your younger people today… are less healthy an’ more sicker… than their own parents were at the same age just a generation ago. They say 30 today – is the new 45.
Hey – I never seen a bigger bunch of pasty, out-breath weakling weasels… as your young people today. Maybe because the only part of the younger generation getting any exercise today – is their dang thumbs on their stupid smartphones!!!
Let me tell you something… an’ this is not bragging. This is just a sad, true fact. I drink like a fish. I smoke like a chimney. I have worked so hard for so long – I have actually worked my body down to the nub. And I can probably still take my teenage boy in a 100 yard foot race. I could probably take him in a half-mile race, too – if my lungs held out. Like I said – that is sad.
You know how come your kids today has gone soft. Because when you and me were growing up… we weren’t afraid a hard work. When we were in school and we got a summer job… it was on a farm. When we got out of school an’ we got our first real job… it was in a factory. We weren’t afraid to bend over an’ pick stuff up. We actually had to move to make a living.
Kids today… they’re like giant brains on useless blob bodies. My own child spends so much time in his room on them dang computers and video games… I swear the kid might be part vampire. ‘Cause I ain’t seen him in the sunlight the last two years. Yeah – put another ten years on him – you think he’s gonna be healthy? Hell no.
Wake up, America. It’s sad but true… that kid has been in the dark so long … Casper the Ghost has a better tan than my boy. Yeah – Powder got a better glow to him. I don’t know what to do. I’m Earl Pitts, American. Pitts Off.