They say 30… is the new 45.

By on December 9, 2013

tinfoilYou know what makes me sick?  You know what makes me so mad I just wanna  chew on tin-foil?

I have always believed in the idea today’s younger generation has gone soft.  And now it is an actual fact.  They done a study – and they found out your younger people today… are less healthy an’  more sicker… than their own parents were at the same age just a generation ago.  They say 30 today – is the new 45.

Hey – I never seen a bigger bunch of pasty, out-breath weakling weasels… as your young people today. Maybe because the only part of the younger generation getting any exercise today – is their dang thumbs on their stupid smartphones!!!

drink-like-fishLet me tell you something… an’  this is not bragging.  This is just a sad, true fact.  I drink like a fish.  I smoke like a chimney.  I have worked so hard for so long – I have actually worked my body down to the nub.  And I can probably still take my teenage boy in a 100 yard foot race.   I could probably take him in a half-mile race, too – if my lungs held out.  Like I said – that is sad.

You know how come your kids today has gone soft.  Because when you and me were growing up… we weren’t  afraid a hard work.  When we were in school and we got a summer job… it was on a farm.  When we got out of school an’ we got our first real job… it was in a factory.  We weren’t afraid to bend over an’ pick stuff up.   We actually had to move  to make a living.

8308685_sKids today… they’re like giant brains on useless blob bodies.  My own child spends so much time in his room on them dang computers and video games… I swear the kid might be part vampire.  ‘Cause I ain’t seen him in the sunlight the last two years.  Yeah – put another ten years on him – you think he’s gonna be healthy?  Hell no.

Wake up, America.  It’s sad but true… that kid has been in the dark so long … Casper the Ghost has a better tan than my boy.  Yeah – Powder got a better glow to him.   I don’t know what to do.  I’m Earl Pitts, American.  Pitts Off.

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