Stupid Things People Say

By on February 6, 2015
stupid things people say

You know what makes me sick?  You know what makes me so mad I just wanna go over the rainbow with Dorothy and Toto… just so I can pinch the heads off munchkins?

I hate it when people say stupid stuff that don’t make no sense.  I’ll give you a good example.  Me and my buddy Dub Meeker got into an argument at work with a co-worker… and she spent a good part of the morning in the boss’s office.  So me and Dub have been worried about what she said… and what could happen. stupid things people say

Well – Runt Wilson is listening to us commiserate… and he goes, ‘Boys – what you don’t know – won’t kill you.’

I looked at him – and I go – you know – ‘That’s the dumbest saying anybody ever came up with.  We don’t know stuff that kills us all the time.  Have you never watched C.S.I.?    There’s always people getting killed by stuff they don’t know.  That’s why they got medical examiners.  ‘Hey, Doc… do you know what killed him?’   ‘No – but we’re still looking.’

Have you ever heard somebody say… ’He never knew what hit him.’?   Well – then there’s a good chance he didn’t know what killed him.   So don’t tell me what I don’t know won’t kill me… because there’s probably a better than 50/50 chance – it will.

Here’s another dumb thing people say that grips me by the short-hairs and twists.  When you’re dead – and your family does stupid stuff… using the excuse – that’s the way you would have wanted it.  I do not pretend the understand the wishes and the ambitions of the recently departed.  But other people keep doing it all the time.  Stop it.

Here’s my take sister – you’re off to the Bahamas with your old man’s best friend – just two weeks after the funeral.   I don’t care what you think – that is not the way Dwayne would have wanted it.  In fact – Dwayne might be clawing at the top of his casket right now… trying to stop you.

Wake up, America!!!   You know – if we thought first before we said stuff…maybe we wouldn’t have so much stupid stuff to say.  And – when you think about it – this daily commentary would be a lot shorter.  I’m Earl Pitts, American.  Like me on Facebook.   And Pitts Off!

Loading Facebook Comments ...