You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just go down to the local college and rub two social justice snow-flakes together… And make a puddle?
Yeah – today I got a bone to pick with your hippy-dippy millennial hipster dip-wads. On account of, you know – they’re so fired up about changing the world for their own evil purposes. And they don’t care who else gets trampled for their selfish needs.
I saw this list on the computer – foods that only Baby Boomers eat – on account of – millennials hate them. They said #1 was meat loaf – which your little fragile dim-witted hipsters think the name sounds as horrifying as it looks and the taste.
Plus they said, baby boomers are the only people still eating TV dinners, corn flakes, canned soup, plain toast… And even going to buffet restaurants.
Well – that’s an interesting list
But might I suggest to you know-nothing, self-important hipster bone-heads — meat loaf is not a baby boomer food. Meat loaf is America itself… on the supper table.
See, when you make a meat loaf – you mix together a bunch of ingredients. Just like America, mixing together different cultures and ethni-ticities. That’s because your loaf – aka – your America – always tastes better combined – than just the individual parts. Now that’s why meat loaf is America.
Then you put that meaty mixture in a pan. That would be your geographical country. With borders – I might add – or pan sides. So, you don’t get grease in your oven – or grief on your continent.
Cook all those ingredients together for two or three hundred years. And you got America – land of the free and home of the brave. Or 45 minutes for the meat loaf.
So, if you little dink-headed, blow-hard snowflakes don’t like meat loaf – I’m not surprised. Y’all want it. But you just don’t get it.
Wake up, America! I guess if we called it heritage grass-fed beef with artisan spices… And baked it in a brick over – y’all’d be all over it. But we don’t – we call it meat loaf. And to real Americans – that’s just fine. I’m Earl Pitts, American. Pitts Off!