You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna paint my face to look like a tree… and see if I can get a woodpecker to drill a hole in my forehead?
Okay – this is freaky – and I am not making this up. This week. This week in America – we got a car driving from California to New York City – all by itself – without a driver.
I seen the story about this. They got a driverless robot car – with laser beams and cameras and computers. And it’s driving cross the country – all by itself. Which is an amazing thing. It’s dangerous as hell, too.
Let’s face it – technology is phenomenal. They got this sucker tweaked out with space shuttle-type electronics. Pin-point GPS sensors. State of the art laser beam instrumentation. And then they put in on the road with the rest of us idiots.
I ain’t worried about no magic driverless robot car driving to New York City. I’m worried about Dub Meeker when he passes this thing on the Interstate. I mean – think about this… you’re passing a car on the highway… and you look over… and there ain’t nobody driving. You’re liable to go off the road.
Then Johnny Law comes up cause you’re wheel deep in mud in the medium strip. He says, “What happened?” And you go, “I passed a car and there wadn’t nobody driving it.” And he’ll go – “You better blow into this…”
Yeah – technology is wonderful… and you’re touching your nose and counting backerts from 100.
Here’s another one – what if you was hitchhiking… and a car with nobody in it pulled over to pick you up? Lord – that story has Stephen King written all over it.
Wake up, America! So if you’re out there this week…and you see a crazy, driverless robot car – give the rest of us a heads up. So we don’t think we went nuts. I’m Earl Pitts, American. Buy my books, Wake Up America – and Man Rules. And Pitts Off.