Cuss words show the most verbal dexterity

You know what makes me sick?  You know what makes me so mad I just wanna pee on a power line?

I just heard on the radio the other day… they got this new study out there – and it says the most intelligent people – use the most cuss words.  Yeah – the people with the biggest vocabulary of curse words show the most verbal dexterity.  And that means – they’re smart.

That’s when I realized – Junior Meeker is probably the smartest guy on earth.  Unless, of course, Stephen Hawking can type out a few f-bombs…

Junior Meeker is a verbal magician.  He can take a regular word… separate it in half… insert a cuss word in the middle… and invent a totally new dirty word.  Or as he calls it – in-freaking-credible.

You know how some people get wound up… and you can listen to them talking and count the cuss words?   When Junior Meeker gets on a roll – you actually have to count the non-cuss words.  On account of – trust me -It’s easier.

I have been to church with Junior Meeker… and I have heard him use cuss words – in his prayers.  That takes way more guts than I got.

Some people claim Junior Meeker uses colorful language.  The only color I’ve ever heard him talking – is blue.

I remember – we went to a riverboat casino one time to see Andrew Dice Clay in concert.  And Andrew Dice Clay wouldn’t take the stage… on account of – the guy in the fifth row offended him.  Guess who that was.

And all this time… I figured Junior Meeker was just mean.  Turns out – he’s a genius.

Wake up, America!!!   Of course – when he ain’t talking… Junior still acts dumb as a rock.   So maybe he’s just one of those profanity savants.   Like the Rain Man of dirty words.  I don’t know.  Buy my book Man Rules – I’m Earl Pitts, American.  Pitts Off.

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