All posts by Earl Pitts

  • coffee cans
    Coffee Cans… Another American Institution Lost

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna punch a walrus? And I don’t even know where to find a walrus! My old lady had me running to the...

    • Posted October 27, 2018
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  • Miracle Whip
    Miracle Whip People vs Mayonnaise People

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna play Twister… with a grizzly bear? The battle of Miracle Whip people! I am one of those people… every day alive...

    • Posted October 25, 2018
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  • beaver butt whiskey
    Beaver Butt Whiskey… What Will They Think of Next?

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna eat a bag of microwave popcorn… before it’s popped? I got further proof – these dumb-butt millennial hipsters are ruining America....

    • Posted October 23, 2018
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  • lady farts
    Lady Farts are a Sign of Honesty

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna judge the bean-eating contest at the Miss Over-Sized America contest?? It’s when lady farts! Yeah – me and the boys was...

    • Posted October 22, 2018
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  • Baby Names
    Baby Name Radio Promotion

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna dust my butt with 11 herbs and spices… and then set in a hot tub full of lard? Hell yeah –...

    • Posted October 18, 2018
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  • Paper Gown
    You Can’t Look Manly in a Paper Gown

    You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me so mad I just wanna play ‘got you nose’ with a wounded badger? If you’re ever given a choice – take the paper gown. Yeah – I’m...

    • Posted October 16, 2018
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